I am tired but will post out of guilt. I need to record these moments that mean so much to me.
I have decided to make a list called "LESSONS LEARNED AT INTERNATIONAL DAYS" to pass on to my kids. This fair only comes around once a year and NEVER changes, but I am somehow surprised each time I attend.
- If you have it, flaunt it. If you are disgusting, flaunt even more of it.
- You don't have to wear a shirt just because you are leaving the house.
- If you like the smell of cigarette smoke, everyone else must LOVE it. Especially the baby you brought. Keep blowing smoke in his face.
- People love the sound of you screaming at your kids. My favorite in 2009 was the guy who kept yelling, "Boy! Git over here."
- If you feel tired, lay on the grass. Or the sidewalk, or the gutter. Who cares if you are at the fair.
-DO NOT COME TO INTERNATIONAL DAYS IF YOU HAVE A WARRANT OUT FOR YOUR ARREST! I cannot stress this enough - I have seen too many peoples' day ruined with a trip to the county jail.
- It's worth a try asking if Margarita snowies have alcohol in them. You never know.
- If you have any kind of scary dog, bring it.
- Make sure you bring at least $200 for each kid. There are many treasures to be found, most of them are frogs.
- Be prepared to run into your baby's mama and her new boyfriend.
- Never make fun of other people at International Days. You will get your A** kicked.
- Always take a hot shower after International Days. A long, hot shower.
5 comments:
I love the Barbie pic. I think it should be included in the sex ed curriculum at the elementary school.
classic quotes from the fair
"whach chu looking at"
"You don't know me"
Good Times.
i used some of your words of wisdom today in my lesson.
"there are many treasures at the fair and in life. most of them are frogs."
i think i really got through to them today. thanks.
Our house now has 2 of the said frogs
You forgot about drinking goldfish that you have just won. Oh, wait. That was the much anticipated celebration at Notre Dame.
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